Cowboy Jackson

Grace was a cowgirl for Halloween. Ever since, Jackson has been attached to her cowboy hat. He wears it all around the house, even to the table. Isn't he cute?

I have to share this video of our dinnertime. We couldn't have two different kiddos when it comes to food. Jackson the carnivore. Grace the herbivore.
In case you are wondering what in the world they're eating, it's fajitas. Jackson devours the meat while Grace begs to have the peppers and onions! It's a recipe I will soon be sharing since it's one of our favorite once-a-month cooking recipes (the ones you make in a large batch and freeze for quick meals later).

Let it Snow!

We were blessed with a major dose of snow today. It was that pretty, stick to the trees type of snow. Call me crazy, but I love snow. I was so excited that we finally got a nice good snow that we could go play in. Jackson didn't really get a chance to play in the snow last year and I was curious what his reaction would be this year.

To say it was a hit would be an understatement. Daddy would make snowballs and Jackson would throw them. Then Jackson would say "I nee ball" until daddy or mommy made him another. Repeat 100 times (at which point I had to leave for choir practice).

Grace had a lot of fun as well. She was so excited to get ski gloves this year that will keep her hands dry! Mom, after I took this picture I put her hood on to cover those ears :)

After I left they made a snow man. When I got home Grace told me they made a snow kitty. Daddy said he didn't realize this when he made it and her telling me was the first he'd heard of it referred to as a kitty. Apparently there isn't much of a difference between snow men and snow kitties.

six years.

Six years ago Heaven welcomed our little Micah. I remember it as if it was yesterday and yet it feels like such a distant time for me.

Six years.

What would it be like to have a six year old? How would our lives be different if he would have lived?

Would he be helping daddy fix cars already?
Would we have been watching him play soccer this fall?
What would he look like now?
Would he have curls like Grace and Jackson?
Blue eyes like his brother or brown like his sister?

The cemetary where he is burried is located right across from an elementary school. As we stood there today it was so hard to believe that if things had been different he would be going there now.

As I was taking the moment in, I looked over to where Jordan was holding Grace. As I have many times since she was born, I thought about the fact that she would likely not be in our lives had Micah lived. My sweet Grace.

I also thought about all that God taught me through losing Micah. I now possess a deeper understanding of trusting in God and knowing Him as my provider. I am closer to God, my husband and my children as a result. Looking back, I can see how far He has brought me from those lonely November days.

There is still a part of my heart that will always remain empty - no number of children could ever fill that void. But the pain has lessened and I have grown. I find comfort and hope in knowing that I will see him again.