Happy Birthday Jackson!

Bringing the Dirt to the Kitchen Table

Look at the cute helpers we found to help us start seeds today! They were pretty excited about the fact that we had dirt at the kitchen table!

They were actually quite helpful...Jackson has been so hard to get to come inside these days. Jordan asked him "Do you want to go do dirt inside?" and he came running in the house chanting "Do Dirt, Do Dirt". Aside from trying to eat some off his shovel he did really good! Grace was really into planting the seeds and insisted that I let her do it by herself. I ended up letting her, but supervised pretty closely. I hope they're this excited and helpful when it's time to weed the garden!

For Freedom

It's a little late, but I wanted to share a video that Jordan made to recognize the sevicemen from our church (some are relatives of our members). You can see it on youtube if you click HERE. The song is 'For Freedom' by Avalon and our choir sang it for Thanksgiving with this video playing in the background. It's very moving...I hope you will enjoy it.

Cowboy Jackson

Grace was a cowgirl for Halloween. Ever since, Jackson has been attached to her cowboy hat. He wears it all around the house, even to the table. Isn't he cute?

I have to share this video of our dinnertime. We couldn't have two different kiddos when it comes to food. Jackson the carnivore. Grace the herbivore.
In case you are wondering what in the world they're eating, it's fajitas. Jackson devours the meat while Grace begs to have the peppers and onions! It's a recipe I will soon be sharing since it's one of our favorite once-a-month cooking recipes (the ones you make in a large batch and freeze for quick meals later).

Let it Snow!

We were blessed with a major dose of snow today. It was that pretty, stick to the trees type of snow. Call me crazy, but I love snow. I was so excited that we finally got a nice good snow that we could go play in. Jackson didn't really get a chance to play in the snow last year and I was curious what his reaction would be this year.

To say it was a hit would be an understatement. Daddy would make snowballs and Jackson would throw them. Then Jackson would say "I nee ball" until daddy or mommy made him another. Repeat 100 times (at which point I had to leave for choir practice).

Grace had a lot of fun as well. She was so excited to get ski gloves this year that will keep her hands dry! Mom, after I took this picture I put her hood on to cover those ears :)

After I left they made a snow man. When I got home Grace told me they made a snow kitty. Daddy said he didn't realize this when he made it and her telling me was the first he'd heard of it referred to as a kitty. Apparently there isn't much of a difference between snow men and snow kitties.

six years.

Six years ago Heaven welcomed our little Micah. I remember it as if it was yesterday and yet it feels like such a distant time for me.

Six years.

What would it be like to have a six year old? How would our lives be different if he would have lived?

Would he be helping daddy fix cars already?
Would we have been watching him play soccer this fall?
What would he look like now?
Would he have curls like Grace and Jackson?
Blue eyes like his brother or brown like his sister?

The cemetary where he is burried is located right across from an elementary school. As we stood there today it was so hard to believe that if things had been different he would be going there now.

As I was taking the moment in, I looked over to where Jordan was holding Grace. As I have many times since she was born, I thought about the fact that she would likely not be in our lives had Micah lived. My sweet Grace.

I also thought about all that God taught me through losing Micah. I now possess a deeper understanding of trusting in God and knowing Him as my provider. I am closer to God, my husband and my children as a result. Looking back, I can see how far He has brought me from those lonely November days.

There is still a part of my heart that will always remain empty - no number of children could ever fill that void. But the pain has lessened and I have grown. I find comfort and hope in knowing that I will see him again.

Enjoying Fall

"And even when the trees have just surrendered

To the harvest time

Forfeiting their leaves in late September

And sending us inside

Still I notice You when change begins

And I am braced for colder winds

I will offer thanks for what has been and was to come

You are autumn "

- Nicole Nordeman

Mellow. Crisp. Vibrant. Change. Fall is in the air and we're taking advantage of every minute of it.

I made a mega batch of this applesauce today. Delicious (and easy)! I'm putting most in the freezer, so when all the leaves are gone we can still have a taste of fall. Next on my list is caramel apples. I didn't have much luck with them last year - anyone have any tips? They were tasty, but they looked awful...

I took the kiddos to Spring Grove Park the other day and they had a blast going on a nature walk with me. Luckily, I had my camera along and managed to get some cute photos. I love this one of Grace. She has been WAY into The Sound of Music lately and listens to her CD all.the.time. Here she is singing "Sixteen Going on Seventeen". I just love this smile!

I can hardly believe Jackson is almost 18 months old! He is growing up so much these days! He continues to be my little cuddler and I'm just trying to embrace every fleeting moment of this stage. He is such a little "engineer" - always trying to figure out how everything works (child locks and door knobs as well as toys)!

(I'm having issues uploading photos right now, so I'll have to post more later - I got quite a few cute ones)!

Our Summer

1. Swim Lessons: Grace discovered that she LOVES swimming. Had you seen her on her last day you would not have known she started out apprehensive. She did an awesome job and was so brave jumping off the diving board at the end of each day!

2. First Haircuts: Jackson got his first haircut at the end of June. I struggled with wanting to let it stay long and curly, but in the end decided I was sick of him being mistaken for a girl. I wasn't prepared for how much different it would make him look. What a big boy!

3. Saying Goodbye: We said goodbye to Baker Book House at the end of July. Here is a picture of Grace with "Miss S" who worked in the children's area. We are really going to miss her!

4. Jackson and Emma: Emma (my good friend Erin's daughter) is in love with Jackson. I really should have put the picture in where she is touching his hair, because that better describes their relationship! This one was cuter though! Emma really does love Jackson's hair for some reason and is always pulling or patting it. He just sits there and takes it - they are just too cute together!

5. Making Music at the Children's Museum: We took the kiddos to the Grand Rapids Children's Museum in early August and they had a blast. On Thusday nights they have $1 admission which is such a great deal. Highlights were the grocery area, music area and the giant bubbles. We will definately be going back!

6. Jackson & His Papa: We had our annual church picnic earlier this month and I managed to capture this great photo of Jackson and his Papa (Jordan's dad). Our kids are so blessed to have such awesome grandparents who love to be a part of their lives (and we are so blessed to have such wonderful parents)!

7. Checking out the Angora Rabbits: We frequented the farmer's market a lot this summer (mostly because we didn't manage to get a garden in). One Wednesday they had the Critter Barn there with Angora Rabbits, Sheep and Goats. It was cool to see a sampling of what they have at their farm. We need to check out the Critter Barn - we have SUCH animal lovers in this house!

8. Pavement: Last, but certainly not least, our road was paved earlier this month. As much as we've anticipated it, it was very bittersweet for me to actually see the change. We still have a quarter mile dirt driveway to make us feel "away from it all" I suppose!


We've had a great summer, at times relaxing and other times quite busy. We've enjoyed trips to the zoo, Vacation Bible School, lots of relaxing on the deck, playing outdoors and much more which didn't manage to get captured with the camera. As always, there are so many things we didn't get a chance to do before summer slips away. How is it that it always goes so fast?! We are cherishing these last days of summer and looking forward to all that fall brings, especially football games and apple picking. Grace starts ballet again next week and then preschool a week later. I imagine that the routine will feel nice again.

Camping Trip

This weekend we took Grace on her first camping trip up to Young State Park in Boyne City (near Petoskey). We were so happy that the weather held out, aside from a little storm Saturday night. We had such a good time and would have stayed longer if we could have; although, we really were missing Jackson.
(Jackson was spoiled by his grandmas and grandpas while we were away)

{Grace and Roo wait for the tent to be set up}

{Grace enjoys her first hobo pie}

{At the beach}

While we were up north, we went to The Big Ticket Festival in Gaylord on Saturday. I always enjoy going to festivals like this because I love the chance to hear someone new. We were very impressed with new (to us) artist, Betsy Walker. Half way through, Jordan and I turned to each other and said "She reminds me of Nicole Nordeman". She has a fresh, beautiful voice and honost lyrics that we really enjoyed.

The big name artists that we saw were Barlow Girl, Kutless and Toby Mac. Everyone was amazing, but Toby Mac was the most anticipated and definately the most fun! Since she was about two, Grace has loved to listen to Toby Mac in the car with Jordan, so this was a special night for the two of them.

{Waiting for Toby Mac to come on stage}

It was nice while it lasted...

Jackson is sick again - this time with Hand, Food and Mouth Disease (sounds worse than it is). He has a fever, rash and some blisters in his throat. He's doing okay right now, but we had a pretty rough night last night! Just pray he continues to take fluids and all should be well. He made it two weeks without being sick, which is about the longest since the beginning of the year. He had tubes put in about two months ago and instead of being better than before, he's been sick numerous times. Not sure what I'm doing wrong, but my poor little guy continues to catch everything, despite my best efforts.

So we're just relaxing at home watching Baby Einstein together and I thought I'd post some recent pictures.

As you can see, Jackson's hair is getting pretty long and shaggy. I'm just not ready to part with the curls yet, so I'm going to let it grow out for a bit yet. He is changing from my baby into a little boy more every day. He loves to drive his cars all over the house making cute little car noises. He also enjoys getting into anything he's not supposed to be! He's starting to catch on to stopping when we ask, but often smirks and continues on :) He is a cute stinker, that is for sure!

Here's a picture of Grace with her kitten, Edward (AKA: The Worlds Most Patient Kitten). Yes, they are on the Sit and Spin together!

We celebrated half birthdays for Grace and her cousin, Caleb about a week ago. Since their birthdays are so close to Christmas, we decided to do a half birthday party instead which worked out really nice. Grace was quite excited to get a princess scooter from Grandma and Grandpa(she's so excited she's hugging the box!) and matching helmet and knee pads from Uncle Ryan and Aunt Amy.

I just wanted to update this little blog (more for me and my memory's sake) while I had a minute. There are lots of things I should be doing right now, so I better get to them.

Look Who's Walking!

So, I've been non-existent in the blogging world lately, but just had to post this video of Jackson walking. He is so excited to be walking and is just eating up all the attention he is getting! By the time he gets to us he's clapping for himself (or trying to grab my camera, as you'll see in the video)! I just LOVE this toddling stage!

Grandma Ada

Grandma Ada went to be with her Lord on Friday. Below is a shortened version of a video Jordan made highlighting her wonderful life. We will miss her so - anyone who knew her can testify to what a godly, loving, hardworking and spunky woman she was! I only wish I could have known her for longer. Before Grace was born she taught me how to make pickles and every night for over a week she would tell me stories of her growing up, teaching, and her life with Grandpa Jack (who I wish I could have known). I also fondly remember her at Wesleyan Women meetings and loved it when her and her sister Irene would get teasing each other! I guess you had to be there - such fun they were together! Ada has left a legacy that I am proud and blessed to be a part of. What reassurance to know she is in Heaven with Grandpa, Jeff and Micah - and no longer in pain!

Love In the Home

I came across this poem while putting together my MOPS Newsletter this month. The last three stanzas really spoke to me, especially "Love is the key that opens salvation’s message to a child’s heart".


Love in the Home (author unknown)

If I live in a house of spotless beauty
With everything in its place,
But have not love, I am a
Housekeeper – not a homemaker

If I have time for waxing, polishing,
And decorative achievements, but
Have not love, my children learn
Cleanliness – not godliness

Love leaves the dust in search
Of a child’s laugh
Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints
On a newly cleaned window

Love wipes away the tears before it
Wipes up the spilled milk
Love picks up the child before it
Picks up the toys

Love is present through the trials
Love reprimands, reproves and is responsive

Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler,
Runs with the child and then stands aside to let
The youth walk into adulthood

Love is the key that opens salvation’s
Message to a child’s heart

Before I became a mother I took glory
In my house of perfection
Now I glory in God’s perfection of my child

As a mother, there is much I must teach my child,
But the greatest of all is love

In case you've forgotten....

...what I look like: Grace surprised me with this portrait yesterday. My heart just swelled at seeing this! Three little letters in the handwriting of my sweet little girl - I am so blessed and proud to be a mom.

On a side note, all of Grace's people occasionally have ears, feet, a nose, fingers or hair...but always have a bellybutton. It's very important to her. I'm sure there must be some deeper meaning in this. Snicker.

Ballet

We went and and bought Grace's ballet outfit today (which she picked out all on her own). She starts her ballet/tumbling class in about a week and is getting "prepared" by practicing all her moves in her bedroom. She looks so stinkin' cute, if you ask me!

I'm also happy to report that after almost two weeks of being sick, little Jax is finally back to being happy and healthy! This mommy is so grateful! Wasn't sure how many more of those poopy diapers I could take!

Grace's Birthday

On December 15 we celebrated Grace's fourth birthday (yes, almost a month ago now, I realize, but I think Grandma might like to see the pictures). She was so happy to recieve what she has been wanting for months now - a bunny! The first name she picked out was "Bestest Friend Forever and Ever I Love You"...very sweet, but a mouthful. After suggesting a shorter name she came up with "Lulu", which is different, but at least shorter :)


In addition to the bunny, Grace recieved Anne of Green Gables and The Secret Garden audio books on CD (by Focus on the Family). They are two of her favorite movies, so to have them to listen to was very cool to her. Many days she can be found in her room playing dress up listening to them!

We went to Chuck-E-Cheese's with my side of the family, which is always crazy but worth the fun! Grace learned how to play Ski-Ball for the first time and was a riot to watch. She would be so excited when the ball would make it all the way up, even though it went in the "gutter" so to speak. We would whoop and holler when it made it - even though she didn't score any points! We had a great time, except for the fact that daddy was home sick.

On Sunday, we had the Krause bunch over for the sugar fest - that is the Candyland cake! Grace saw a version of this cake in one of her grandma's cooking magazine's this summer and asked if I would make it for her birthday. Cake decorating, however, is not a skill that was passed down to me; Although, determination was! So this mama did her best. Not that Grace cared one bit how it looked, as she was just happy to see more sugar per square inch than she ever has in her life!

It is incredibly hard to believe that it was four years ago already that I held this long-awaited, beautiful, wide eyed babe in my arms. Grace continues to bring me joy, as she did from the moment I knew she was blossoming inside of me. I am thankful for every day I have with this mostly sweet, often curious, sometimes silly, always passionate, head in a book, bright eyed girl.

And lastly, here are a few pictures of Grace's new bedroom which is pretty much done now. Many thanks to daddy and grandpas who helped us get this done in record time! Now I have to do my part and get the place a bit decorated!

Here she is in her closet where we created a cozy little reading area.

Merry Christmas

We are having so much fun just relaxing in our pj's, playing with the kiddos, sipping cocoa (with lots of marshmallows) listening to Christmas music (our current favorite is Behold the Lamb of God - the true tall tale of the coming of Christ by Andrew Peterson), and spending some much loved time with our families. Have a Merry Christmas!

bittersweet milestones

Gracie moved out of her old room and into her new room in the basement today. I'll have to post pictures when I get some time. The room is so big and spacious. I think we need another girl to fill it up better! We set up a beanbag chair in her closet with a bin of books as her little "reading nook" - she was tickled! She is so excited over her new space. I was the one who had a hard time when I tucked her in for the night - realizing she's two floors away now. I think I forget how much she has grown up - she is nearly four!

I wasn't anticipating moving Jackson out of our room just yet (as much as I'm ready in so many other ways I'm not!), but somehow we decided to do it all in the same day! I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed now! Since Jackson is our last baby, it seems as though every milestone is a door that is closing in my life as a momma. Knowing my last little baby is no longer right next to me during the night is so bittersweet. Perhaps if we adopt as we hope to some day, we'll find ourselves back in some of these "baby days". As hard as some of these baby days (and nights) are - they are some of the sweetest!

Just Thinking...

Wow, it's way too late for me to be up and especially posting on this lil' blog of mine...The house is so nice and quiet which is quite a change from the last few nights of Jackson being up crying (all of us, except Jordan, are sick). Figured I'd post some new pictures of the kiddos before I headed up to bed. Then I had had these thoughts and couldn't go to bed without getting them out. I'm pretty tired here, but I think I can work this out from head to "paper".

We hung up our nativity calendar yesterday and on it hangs our first days symbol: the star which pointed the way to Jesus. I was just gazing at it, somewhat lost in thought, when it struck me how much it's my first responsibility as a parent to show the way, as the star once did, to Christ for my children. As I was sitting there lost in thought I was really evaulating my parenting as of late. To be honost, I've been caught up in details and schedules and "behavior charts" and less the reflection of Christ and unconditional love that I want to be. It's somewhat ironic, because where the nativity calendar now hangs, was Grace's behavior and responsiblility chart which I had taken down to make room for the nativity calendar. It really made me think what else I should be "taking down" so to speak in order to let the light of Christ shine through out this home and in my life. I don't think that schedules and charts are bad, because Grace really thrives on them, but I think that they have been too much of our focus here lately. I don't want my kiddos to think those things are most imporant to me, because SO much more than that I want my children to know, love and and in turn serve Christ. My focus has been off and I can see that now - I'm so glad God continues to break through to me to help me be a (hopefully) better parent.

Now that my head is (somewhat) clear, I think I'll head to bed!

Florida Trip Top Ten

1. Spending a whole week with the family. So nice to spend some time with everyone and to be able to relax and focus on the kids more than we are usually able to. So many wonderful memories to cherish!

2. Jackson's first visit to the ocean. He loved the beach and having the waves wash up on his toesies. You would have never known he had screamed the whole drive over (never wake a sleeping baby - and then make them sit in a car seat for 45 minutes - lesson learned)!

3. Flying...well not my personal favorite as I'm not a big fan of the whole being five miles off the ground, but definately a favorite for Grace. She thought the whole thing was completely awesome! I can't believe I didn't get a picture of Jackson's first time flying! He did a great job on the plane, but the little stinker had a dirty diaper both times! Changing diapers on a plane takes a certain skill - Jordan and I are now certified!

4. Seeing the sharks at Sea World. Although she was a bit apprehensive at first, one of Grace's favorite parts of our trip was seeing the sharks. She used her allowence to get this shark stuffed animal. She has been sleeping with it every night...This is the same girl that is often Princess Frostine or Princess Aurora!

5. Playing in the pool at the condo. Despite how cold the pool was, the kiddos looked forward to their afternoon swim everyday - even Jackson! Grace really surprised me with how well she is getting at swimming!

6. A papa to snuggle with! Such a sweet sweet sight! Jackson fell asleep on Grandpa twice - at Epcot and Animal Kingdom.

7. Hanging out with the boys. Jackson loved hanging out with Caleb and Luke at the condo and was so excited to see them every morning. Oh the fun he is yet to have with them!




8. Animal Kingdom. We went to the Animal Kingdom last - you could say it was Grace's "saving park". She was most looking forward to this part of Disney. It did not let us down. The highlight was definately the safari ride, specifically seeing the elephants.

9. The fireworks and laser show at Epcot. This picture is of the kiddos snuggling before the show started. Soon after Jackson fell asleep and stayed sleeping through the whole show! Grace was very brave and loved the fireworks (although I did cover her ears for the really loud ones)! She said she liked the music the best.

10. Rides at Magic Kingdom. Grace's favorites were the Dumbo ride, Alladin's Magic Carpet Ride and the Tea Cup Ride. The parade at the end of the day was also a highlight for all of us.